Relationship Advice

Take a mini-vacation. Go away for the weekend, or for an hour or two, with minimal planning, just because it seems like a good idea.

Spontaneity is a wonderful way of keeping your relationship fresh. The more often you act spontaneously, the more likely you are to do so again. Be sure to take time to do what you want to do as well as to follow through on all of your commitments.

Your weekly assignment, should you choose to accept it:

Decide what you want to do, and Just Do It!

This is an excerpt from Being Happy Together: How to Have a Fabulous Relationship With Your Life Partner in Less Than an Hour a Week, by Laurie Weiss, Ph.D.

Technorati Tags: Relationship Advice, Play, Relationships

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Every troubled relationship has at its core a problem one or both partners experienced when they were children. Truly what happens when you’re a child makes an enormous difference in your ability to have a healthy relationship as an adult.

One of the most troubling things that can happen to a child is a betrayal when she or he experiences sexual mistreatment by someone in a position of trust. Even more troubling is that nobody wants to talk about the problem.

Many people have reported to me that, as children, they did tell somebody, somebody who should have been able to help. Instead, this trusted adult told the child to never talk about it again.

And so they don’t talk about it. But the problem doesn’t go away, and in fact many of those people who were abused become perpetrators of inappropriate sexual behavior themselves.

Dr. Loren Due’s new book, Shhhh… Don’t Say a Word About This! brings this Read the rest of this entry »

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This story published by Steve Goodier of
http://www.lifesupportsystem.com truly moved me.
I thank Steve for his permission to share it with
you.

TRUE LOVE

I’m not sure I can always tell love from passion.
One father said of his teenaged son, “I don’t
know if he’s in love or in heat!” What
teenager would know? Besides, feelings of
attraction can change more quickly than a pouty
expression.

But love, in its truest form, is greater than
feelings. It is as much a decision as it is a
feeling.

Love is what Mr. and Mrs. Strauss shared. Mrs.
Isadore Strauss was one of the few first class
women passengers to go down with the Titanic in
1912, and she drowned because she could not bear
to leave her husband.

They remained calm throughout the excitement of
the sinking vessel. They both aided frightened
women and children to find places aboard
lifeboats. Finally, Mr. Strauss, who had
repeatedly urged his wife to claim a spot safely
aboard a lifeboat, forced her to enter one.

She was seated but a moment, however, when she
sprang up and climbed back on deck before he
could stop her. There, she caught his arm,
snuggling it familiarly against her side, and
exclaimed, “We have been long together for a
great many years. We are old now. Where you go, I
will go.”

Where you go, I will go. It is a decision to be
together, come what may. I suspect she said
something like that to him many times before.
Maybe the words she used were different, but the
meaning was the same. I want to be with you.
Let’s do this together.

Where you go, I will go. It’s a decision to love.
It is deciding to be there, wherever “there” may
be. It is a decision to sacrifice, if sacrifice
is needed. And it is choosing to re-decide it all
over again tomorrow and the next day and the
next.

As the ship sank beneath icy water on that cold
and dark, April night, the Strausses merely
re-made a decision they had made many times
before throughout their life together. They
decided on each other.

Where you go, I will go. At the heart of true
love is often a decision, made again and again,
to face the next day together … hand in hand.

– Steve Goodier

Now you can add your own comments to Life
Support.
http://stevegoodier.blogspot.com/

Visit our Personal Development Blog

Technorati Tags: Togetherness, Relationships, Care of Your Partner

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Add your own thoughts to the conversation only after your partner acknowledges that you understand. This slows down a difficult conversation and makes it less likely that you will say things that you will later regret.

In a heated discussion, you probably want to be absolutely sure that your partner understands your point of view. You may even be ready to explain it at length. Read the rest of this entry »

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Tell the truth about what you do and do not like or want. Trying to be agreeable when you really do not agree leads to confusion and resentment.

If you have been pretending that you love your partner’s favorite Read the rest of this entry »

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Create a mature, loving relationship by using the ideas in Being Happy Together: How to Have a Fabulous Relationship With Your Life Partner in Less Than an Hour a Week. Loving relationships do not just happen. Creating them is a rewarding and worthwhile challenge.

In a mature loving relationship, you can easily discuss values, solve problems, have fun together and nurture and support each other. You and your partner empower each other and the relationship becomes powerful, exciting, playful, nurturing and creative. You feel excited, safe and loved.

Your assignment, should you choose to accept it:

Each of you separately list times when you have discussed values, solved problems together, had fun together, and nurtured or supported each other. Compare your lists. If you had trouble coming up with examples in any area, discuss ways in which you might try some new things together to fill up the empty category.

This is an excerpt from Being Happy Together: How to Have a Fabulous Relationship With Your Life Partner in Less Than an Hour a Week, by Laurie Weiss, Ph.D.

Technorati Tags: Relationship Advice, About Relationships, Relationships

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Go to obedience school training with your dog. You have to learn to communicate clearly about boundaries when you work with animals.

This obviously isn’t for everybody, but it’s surprising how effective it is. When someone is giving you feedback about the messages you are sending to your dog, you often learn a great deal about your general communications style. When you do this together, learning to provide consistent messages to your dog, you tend to see your own patterns of inconsistencies and learn to correct them.

Your assignment, should you choose to accept it:

Spend some time researching obedience school training classes. Your veterinarian, a local pet store and friends are all good resources.

This is an excerpt from Being Happy Together: How to Have a Fabulous Relationship With Your Life Partner in Less Than an Hour a Week, by Laurie Weiss, Ph.D.

Technorati Tags: Relationship Advice, Boundaries, Communication

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Schedule time to play together. Keep a list of activities you each consider fun. Take turns choosing an item from the list, and do it.

When you aren’t used to playing, it’s sometimes hard to figure out what you want to do when you have time to do it. Take time to make this list before you are ready to use it. Include activities that each one of you enjoys separately, activities you think you might enjoy, and activities you have enjoyed together in the past.

Your assignment, should you choose to accept it:

Take the time to make your list. Start by making separate lists, and then brainstorm together about other items you could add to the list. Don’t worry about cost or feasibility. Having outrageous items on your list creates interesting possibilities.

This is an excerpt from Being Happy Together: How to Have a Fabulous Relationship With Your Life Partner in Less Than an Hour a Week, by Laurie Weiss, Ph.D.

Technorati Tags: Relationship Advice, Play, Togetherness, Relationships

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Speak in sentences or, at most, paragraphs instead of pages during a difficult conversation. Your partner will only remember the last sentence or two you say and forget the beginning of a long speech.

It’s paradoxical! The more you want to be certain you are understood, the more you talk Read the rest of this entry »

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Laurie will be interviewed on Barbara Dixon’s Spirit Speaks blog radio talk show. Her topic is “How to Nurture Your Relationship During These Changing Times.”

Tune in at 10:00 a.m. ET on Monday, March 16. by clicking the Play button in the box below:

You will be taken directly to the online player for the interview.

If you would like to comment or ask questions during the interview, you can call in at (646) 727-3956.

Technorati Tags: Relationship Advice, Relationships, Difficult Communication, Money

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